"Can't We Talk?"

The author Deborah Tannen gave a list of how men and women view situations with different objectives. To start off, she introduced herself as a linguistic specialist and proceeded in a somewhat authoritative manner by addressing the issue she wants to talk about. This is quite a unique scenario, given that the author is a female and normally female writers tend to be less direct and prefer to dance around the topic with explanations rather than dive straight into it. The article was done in such a manner, probably to draw the attention to issues that she felt were being ignored in everyday conversations.

The focus on her article is on how gender focus on different angle when viewing the same issue. Men on the general, tend to look at problems and break them down into soluble parts before they proceed to with the appropriate actions. Whereas women view problems not by the content of the problem itself, rather they looked at the reaction of their counterparts before deciding on their course of action. For women, the problem itself is of less importance if they are able to communicate their thoughts across to their intended recipient.

Tannen’s article also conform to the gender stereotype that women can’t seem to express their true intentions to men as the words they used often carried other meanings. As with John Gray’s Mars and Venus book, women often say one thing and meant another, and men being more direct often have trouble deciphering what women are trying to say most of the time. The article also pointed out that men are more concerned about their status with example such as ‘Josh replied, "I can't tell my friend, 'I have to ask my wife for permission'!"’ Given the competitive nature of men, it is no wonder that male dominance exist in the society, women on the other hand derives no such pleasure in maintaining their social status for they tend to occupy themselves with emotional support, intimacy and understanding. Hence from an essentialist point of view, it is easy to understand why society is dominated by men.

response to Tannen, “Teachers’ Classroom Strategies”

I think it is interesting that in class we discussed about issues involving the content of the paper and not the actual content of the paper itself. Furthermore we discussed about the agenda and motive behind the way the writer approach her audience, something which were not taught throughout the many years of education that i had. Author Deborah Tannen explained about how the different methods of learning by gender results in different opportunities to absorb the content of the classes. She mentions that in a conventional classroom where students are expected to speak up, male students actually benefitted more from such learning pattern as they better adapt at such challenges. This also led to the view that Tannen took an essentialist point of view as she simply separates the learning ability of her student based on their gender.

However she did provide some unbiased basis by including a personal experiment which splits her class according to their learning ability and their cultural background instead of their gender, and results was at variance of what her original idea was. I felt that this aspect provided her paper with a sharper edge to back up her claims of females being at disadvantage in classrooms, because she doesn’t just provide a one-sided argument, but the example she gave was not substantial enough as the sample size was only just one class, which was to be expected as studies as such required more manpower.

Another look at the publisher and one can tell that the intended audience for Tannen’s article is the teaching community, which reveals the purpose of her writing the article. She wrote the paper in a slightly informal tone as she constantly projects herself into the paper, using examples of herself and positive results to promote her cause. The reason behind her doing that might because she is trying to introduce a concept to audience who have worked with the same method for decades and might even be more experienced than herself. Hence, if she were to write the article in such a way that it contains only factual information, the audience might be turned off and end up being less receptive to the idea that she is trying to push through.

Overall i felt that the article was a good read as the author attempts to raise awareness of the difference in communication style which might be hindering female students’ chances of learning on the same platform.

What is tootsie?

The movie “Tootsie” was produced in an era before my time; it showed a man playing the role of a woman and how well liked he is in the society within the movie, and the show relied a lot on the artistes’ acting ability and not visual effects. Some of the power dynamics of gender role are sort of outdated in the current context of Singapore’s society. The transformation into Dorothy seems a little far-fetched into Singapore’s society but since it’s a show, there can be some slack in judgement. In my opinion, the appearance of Dorothy seems a little short of looking like a real woman; hence the idea of men falling head over heels for her seems just a tad unbelievable.

In the film, Michael slightly altered his attitude to a more submissive role. One example is that he apologised when chided by the director, something which would not have taken place if he using his true identity. He appeared feminine because he was more receptive to other people’s problem, and was less direct in rejecting a proposal. However, some of the elements of Michael’s personality still existed in that Dorothy, in the sense that “she” was more stubborn and more willing to stand up to any ill treatment from men. These unique traits from Michael draw attention from both “her” male and female counterpart. The possible reasons might be that men find such daringness in Dorothy attractive and refreshing, and that “she” reduced the need to for these men to perform her “gentlemen” duties. Whereas women find her an inspiration for their plight, as she constantly stood up to the director’s ridiculous demands. Her role was well received with the female audience of that era as protrudes as a beacon in a society of male dominance.

The character Nurse Kimberly was another popular figure in the soap opera as female audience relates to her plight. Kimberly plays a role of a submissive nurse, giving in to needs of male doctors or patient. Perhaps during the era that such shows was broadcasting, the audience which are mainly made up by housewives, sympathise Kimberly as they see themselves as being in her shoes.

Michael mentioned that he became a better man when he was a woman because playing the role of a female has forced him to be more receptive to needs of women surrounding him. It reinforces the gender stereotype that men are ignorant to the needs of women and that women has more emotions to play on when maintaining relationships. Although there is a mixture of gender role play, overall the movie perpetuates the status quo of gender issues. The men plays a dominant role in society, holding important roles such as directors and agents, whereas women are relegated to simpler roles such as nurses and actresses. Even the speaking style of Dorothy seems to suggest that at that era women have to choose their words wisely for fear of social repercussion.

Gender neutrality?

In this post i will touch on the case of gender neutrality. Born as a male identical twin of the Reimer family, David suffered a cruel fate and was brought up as a girl under the influence of psychologist John Money. The twin brothers were referred for circumcision at the age of 8 months but the procedure did not go as planned and David has his penis burned beyond surgical repair with technology at that point of time. David’s parents then sort out other alternatives and seek the help of John Money, a psychologist who was developing a reputation as a pioneer in the field of sexual development and gender identity. Money was a prominent proponent of the ‘theory of gender neutrality’, that gender identity developed primarily as a result of social learning from early childhood. If the life of Reimer has turned out as planned by Money, perhaps that would have marked a milestone in the long debated issue of Mars vs. Venus, but that is not the case as David grew up shunning his female self.

Below are the links for footage on David Reimer, broken into 5 parts

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GhbVFjIaN0&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noqRhuE8_XA&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ctg3poxT9g&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fnb3EwJtsDs&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OeITsQgKns&feature=related

Growing up, David was ostracized by his peers and neither the female hormones nor upbringing made him feel female. By the age of 13, he was already suffering from suicidal depression, which in turn his parents told him the truth about his sexual identity. At 14, David decided to assume a male identity and eventually got married and became a stepfather of three.

What made this case even more detrimental to the social constructivist’s view is that even under the influence David was different from his twin brother because they had different genitals; he still manages to keep his real sexual identity under check. Even with the lack of testosterone and social concept of a ‘male’ upbringing, it could not overcome the fundamental fact that David was born with a male identity.

Due to the nature of this case, there is only one such example and might not be enough to convince that gender differences are determined the moment one was born. Statisticians might argue that one scenario cannot account for why gender differences lies deep within the biological cells. But statistics only deals with number, and cannot account for particular linguistic feature. The case of David Reimer, in my opinion, has affirmed my stand that gender miscommunications exist because of the fundamental differences of gender and not because of social influence.

7 year old boy/girl Jazz

In light of what we have discussed in lessons so far, i would say that the bulk of the lessons lie in the debate of Essentialism vs. Social Constructivism or in other words Nature vs. Nurture. Instead of elaborating on miscommunication between genders, i thought it would be more efficient if i just look into the issue of transgender. So while searching through youtube, i came across the video of a 7 year old boy, named Jazz, who supposedly wanted to be a girl at such a tender age. Jazz said that he has a girl brain inside a boy’s body, which prompts the thought that did such an idea came about naturally or was it due to social circumstances. Viewers might want to browse through the link with a pinch of salt for i cannot confirm the credibility of the video and whether it was all just a publicity stunt.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7S5usRgY720&feature=related

Let us assume that the kid Jazz was being upfront about the whole transgender issue, i shall look at how essentialism has its flaws in this issue. Born with equal amount of male genes as any of his male counterparts of his age, why is it that Jazz bore such drastic rejection of his own sexuality? With the same biology complex as any male, why does Jazz insist that he was born with a female brain? I doubt that it is the work of any haywire genes flowing in his body, and definitely not because some stray oestrogen has entered his body, thus influencing his mindset. In this context, essentialism doesn’t account for what is going on through the brain of young Jazz.

Now let us once again assume that Jazz was brought up under normal circumstance and he was in no way forced to think about being a transgender by his relatives, i shall be critical to the social constructivism approach. At such young age, i highly doubt that most kids can even comprehend the differences between genders, and how the genitals serve to identify their own sexuality. Thus i can say that it is safe to assume that social dynamic is unable to leave such an impression on the kid, which leaves the upbringing of the child into question. The influence of female family members is highly unlikely to invoke such a reaction, for it is a common sight in any nuclear family. Thus we can abolish the thought that transgender can arise from female influence or admiration. However what if Jazz was brought up by his parents to think that he was suppose to be a girl, would such an environment be the main culprit in this mind boggling case. I have no way of asserting the validity of such a claim, hence in my next post i will touch on this issue and answer any doubts.

This topic might have gone tangent from the communication issues between genders but i thought that it was an interesting point in gender issues. I believe that this should provoke some ideas that not all gender issues can be answered by the two methods mentioned earlier. Below is the link of the website created to raise awareness of transgender issue.

http://www.transkidspurplerainbow.com/index.htm

P.S. I'm having trouble posting links... blogging is not my cup of tea after all..